Tuesday, July 29, 2008


Why does my boyfriend keep sending me links that he knows are just going to infuriate me and make me want to talk about my issue, and then tell me NOT to talk to him about them?!?!?!?!?!

Fucking annoying! Grrrr!

On a related note, I fucking hate the lying scum bags at Telus and I hope they get they asses handed to them in a burlap sack. (Law suits against the big guys)

I suppose verbal contracts aren't binding anymore. I was told by the Telus associate, that along with other things, I would get free incoming text messages, and pay 15ç per outgoing message, and that during my time with Telus - as long as I never changed plans - my fees would never increase.

Well I'd say going from $0 to 15ç an incoming message sure as fuck is a change in fees!! Bastards.

At least I only have two months left. I'm calling in August to make sure they know to cancel my service on the 26th of September becuase I ain't paying them one red cent more.

Fucking money grubbing bastards.

Monday, July 28, 2008


I just felt like I had to share.. It was just one of those moments of such incredible sweetness I needed to tell someone about it. So why not everyone who comes here?

This morning, just before Chris was about to leave for work, he came to say goodbye as he does every morning. Yes, I'm a lazy bones and I sleep in. And he's adorable and always kisses me goodbye. Well this time, he sat down beside me, kinda tucked me in, and told me I looked beautiful. I was drosy, and not quite fully awake, but I think I managed to make a face at him. He expanded saying, "You're normally pretty, but you look beautiful, in a drozy sort of way, but still beautiful." (I think I'm paraphrasing, but that was basically it.)

I just.. I was so overcome. There are no words. My heart melted!

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Fucking Telus....

So today I get both a text message and a fucking phone call from telus telling me about some offer the mailed me. Some offer I never got!

The call told me to go to some website and participate in a survey for a chance to win a blackberry, but this is the real kicker, the survey, the recorded phone message lady tells me ends July 21rst.

Note that today is the 24th of July!!!!

Fucking twisted bastards!!!

Now I'm really wondering what the hell the offer was that I never got, and what the hell the servey was about!

Chris has this to say:

Obviously they're going to say in the media that nobody was really interested in their "who wants no charges on incoming text messages" survey. :P

Sadly I think he might be right. Money Grubbing Bastards!

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Ugh. Not a good way to start the day.

For the record: I hate eggs again. Not for using in things, eggs are wonderful, necessary ingredients in so many yummy baked good, but on their own, as a food item - really not a fan right now. I go back and forth. Sometimes I like eggs. Sometimes - very rarely, and only once that I can remember - I can't get enough of eggs. Sometimes I just can't bare to eat them.

Well I had 3 egg yolks left over in the fridge, so I added a whole egg, some milk, and a rather large white mushroom. Instant omlet! Of course I broke it into sad little pieces when I tried to flip it. I just cannot get the hang of flipping eggs for the life of me.

So I'm eating the damn thing, but I'm trying really hard not to think about the taste, cause yuck!

I'm sure it also doesn't help that for the past 48 hours is seems I've been cursed with very over-zealous post nasal drip. So much so it's bloody well making me nauseous! Nothing I do seems to help! I've been taking an antihistamine & decongestant. The 24 hr kind that always seems to do the trick when my allergies won't let me breathe. I've been taking my flonase once a day religiously. If you ask me they are both just making it worse!


I don't know what to do! It's hard to be conscious when you are this fucking nauseous. Food sucks cause a feel like you are going to be sick. Hell, standing sucks cause the nausea seems almost overwhelming!

What the hell am I supposed to do?! The only anti-nausea medication of know of is gravol and that doesn't work on me! Well, it works, but not how it's supposed to. Gravol makes me UBER nauseaous, followed by dizzy and insanely nauseous, then so drowsy there is no force in the world that could keep me awake!! It's great if I need to knock myself out. Two Gravol and after an hour of nausea and ickiness, I'll be dead to the world for the next 8 hours.

I don't think it's a sinus infection. I don't have a fever. I'm not all achey and sore all over. I don't have a killer headache. It has to be my allergies. But I'm taking everything I have available to me! What the fuck do I do now?!

I really hate being nauseous. I'd rather have a headache! At least I know how to treat that! What do I do?! What can I do?!

*sigh* *pout*

I've been told that ginger ale helps but that requires the hour long trip there and back to the grocery store, and frankly, I just do not think I am up to it. *pout*

Once again I wish I was at home. Why the fuck aren't there any fucking convenience stores around here?!?!?!?! At home, even if I was alone there are THREE stores in a five minute walking radius. Actually, when well, I could walk there and back in five minutes! What the hell is wrong with this neighbourhood?? Seriously!!

Monday, July 21, 2008

Angry Rant

The painters are supposedly coming to finish painting the balcony today. They did the railing on Friday, but it started to rain so they are supposed to come back at some point today to do the ceiling. Why the ceiling of the balcony needs painting and not the floor I don't know. Whatever. I'm just happy the super here is so good about taking care of things. The railings really did need doing.

Them coming back today means however, that I had to schelp everything off the balcony. I was the one who put it back too damnit! And moving those fucking chairs of his really hurt my hand! I told Chris so. I told him I did not want to move them again - that my hand was all sore from doing it. I had to put the ice pack on my hand it was so flipping sore!! He said I wouldn't have to. Well he lied. Damnit. He left for work and didn't move a fucking thing. Well someone had to move them before the painters came, and since I was the only one around that meant me. Grrrrr!

I sent him a text message. A not very pleasant one. Told him, I loved him, but I really hated him for making me move those god damn fucking chairs again. My hand is still sore two fucking hours later. It aches really. It hurts to use my thumb, it hurts to open my hand. It feels all strained and wrong. And I'm totally blaming him for it.

He called me. I wasn't nice. I'm pissed off. I was more pissed off then. Really fucking pissed off. He said I wouldn't have to! Then he fucking forced me to do it. I don't care that he forgot! It's less cruel, but no less inconsiderate! Fuck. He's the one that never fucking lets me do anything! He's the one that's all "careful of your hand!" And then the ONE fucking time I ask him to do something for me, he fucking forgets so I'm forced to do it! Grr. Just. Grrrr!

I'm sitting in the appartment and I don't have a fucking clue what to do with myself today. I know the painters are likely to come at some point, but I don't know when - 9am to 5pm is a big window. I was going to bake today. Coconut cupcakes. But he's pissed me off so badly I have absolutely no fucking desire to bake. Especially not for him. I know that petty and spiteful. But I'm pissed off! I can't help it!

I'm sitting here pouting and frankly I don't want to do a gods damn fucking thing. Well... there are things I kinda want to do, but none of them are productive. In fact they are all very destructive, and I might potentially regret them in the long run. Might. Maybe...

Spiteful. I'm spiteful and I know it. It's hard to control it and frankly I'm far too pissed off to really even want to.

He told me to go out and enjoy the weather when he left. The fucking 88% humidity and 60% chance of rain weather. Yeah, cause that sounds like really good fucking idea.

Especially after he forced me to sleep in! He actually did you know. I was about to get up and he very literally came over and pushed me back down into bed. Now my neck is killing me and I've got a fucking headache. I'm totally blaming him for my pain. I didn't have a headache when I woke up! If he'd only just fucking let me get up. But nooooooo! He just had to be in control. It's really seriously fucking annoying after awhile- his pushy, I-must-ALWAYS-be-in-control attitude.

I can't do fuck all. I can't ever help. "I was going to do that," he always says and stops me from ever being even slightly fucking useful whenever I try. Pisses me right the fuck off.

I really just do not want to be here right now. I don't want to be near him, or his stuff. I don't want to see him. I don't want to think about him. Frankly I'd really like a punching bag so I could let out some of my rage and frustration. I really just want to hit something. Sadly that is not an option. So I don't know what the fuck I'm going to do.

Fucking men. But it's not all men. It's just one man. Pushy. Bossy. Always has to be in control. Can't ever fucking let me do anything. Always has to have his fucking way. Always has to be his way. Doesn't matter what anyone else thinks or wants. Doesn't fucking occur to him to ask. To care. To take it into consideration for fucks sake. Fucking control freak. Fuck!

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Good news for a change!

I can knit again! Well, at least I think I can. I did some knitting yesterday, and it totally didn't hurt, nor did it feel forgein, nor is my hand sore from it!

So so very exciting!

Three of my cousins are pregnant right now, I'm thinking that maybe I will knit them somethings for their babies-to-be. I really really want to get my hands on.... *looks up the titles as I have no memory* ...... The knitters Almanac by Elizabeth Zimmermann! I think I'm going to put in a request for it from my local Hamilton Library in fact!

If I like it, I might end up buying myself a copy, only trouble is, when I did go looking for it, it was the hardest thing to find! Very sad that. Anyway, this is what the library is for, n'est pas? -- Borrowing books you may or may not want forever, but do want to use. :)

I don't really have the money to be buying yarn for these baby gifts though, so I am going to have to search my stash. I might also end up asking my mom for the money. Sort of in a, "if you buy it, I will knit it" kind of way. That way it can be a gift from both of us!

Also, in other good news, Apple finally replaced my keyboard, and ta da! It's working perfectly this time! Very joyus! I really missed being able to cut and paste! (The 'c' key was the first to go funny and non-responsive)

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Money Grubbing Bastards

Telus and Bell. Charging for incoming text messages! Messages that senders already paid for. Messages that the reciever has no way of not accepting. Dispicable. That's what this is. Fucking bastards.

I don't know if this will help, but I signed. If you are as displeased, please sign as well. Can't hurt!

Stop the text message cash-grab

Personally I'm going to try to get out of my contract. I was promised that my plan's fee would never increase. Well I was promised FREE incoming messages... So this is most certainly an incrase. Just gotta find my contract when I get back to Hamilton. I'm cancelling my plan, and I'm gonna fight to get out without paying a fee, THEY are the ones that broke their deal with me. Bastards.

Friday, July 11, 2008

It's My Birthday

So I talked to Neda last night, and feel loads better. Sabrina and I don't always communicate the best, we mean well, but sometimes things don't always come out how we mean them, on both sides.

I was sooo worried my friends were upset with me, but no one is, including Sabrina it seems! So Yay! Angie apparently could talk of nothing else yesterday! Neda's the best. she's aces when it comes to easing worries!

Today has been great. I got woken up by my wonderful boyfriend singing 'happy birthday'. and tonight he brought me home live flowers! They. I think, are Hyacinths, possibly. Pretty in anycase!

Both Sabrina and my mom called to say happy birthday to me, that was really very nice. Brightened up my day. I love my mom... She really is just so good to me. She let me babble at her and everything! lol.

Most things have just gone swimingly today too, which is great. Now I just have to go finish icing my cake for the dinner party tonight. Don't worry, it's at a restaurant -- I'm not about to do that much work on my birthday!

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Damnit!!! (warning potentially incoherent rant ahead)

Why does she always do this to me?!? What's her fucking issue?! Seriously. Gods fucking damnit.

All she had to do was say 'no'. That flipping simple. I was expecting a 'no' from her of all people anyway, all she had to do was say, 'no, sorry, I can't make it'. But nooooooooooooo! She has to go on a rant and make me feel guilty and miserable and give me a fucking ulcer worrying I've forced my friends into something they don't want to do! Mean! Seriously.

I didn't want to ask anyone in the first place because I knew it was a lot to ask, and they NEVER do anything for me, so why should I bleeding well expect them to do this, and on such short notice even.

Now my stomach is in knots and I just want to call the whole thing off..... I feel so gods damn fucking guilty. And angry. Really fucking angry that she just had to give me a guilt trip and make me feel like ALL my friends are pissed off at me! She couldn't just contain her guilt rant to her own issues, oh no, she had to fucking drag everyone else into it. Grr.

None of them had to say 'yes'. They all could have made their excuses. Chris and I could have gone on our own - no big deal. I really would have rather had them do that than being racked with guilt like this!

Now I can't even enjoy baking my cake because all I can think about is that my friends are all pissed off with me. Why the hell did she feel the need to make me feel bad like this!? Does she get fucking joy out of making me miserable?! What the fuck!


She just likes to twist things to make herself feel better! Whatever, that's fine. But spreading her mis-information, sewing discord, and making the rest of my friends angry with me is just seriously low. Low, mean, cruel, and so totally NOT cool! Grrr!

On a happier note, my cakes are cooked and they smell so flipping amazingly coconut-ily delicious! :D Yay! At least baking and I are still friends!

Sunday, July 6, 2008

Get Smart

The movie was frickin' F A B U L O U S ! ! !

I highly recommend it to anyone that loves a good laugh! Especially those that loved the original TV show!

It's SO damn good! Man I laughed my ass off! (Well not literally, never fear there, still overly-well-endowed with butt)

Seriously though, y'all need to go see this movie! I want to go see it again even! It was that good!

I HATE my hair!!!!! Grrrrrr........

I wonder if anyone else has this problem.... I went to the hair dresser and asked for something, LAYERS in this case, and did NOT in any way, shape or form get what I wanted. :( What the hell does one do when the hairdresser ignores your request? I don't want to be stuck with this fucking hair cut for the next three months! Damnit.

Does this ever happen to anyone else?? Am I the only one??

My hair really really needed to be cut, so I understand that I lost like two inches of my length.... I needed, desperately, to loose at least an inch. So this I can live with.

But I wanted LAYERS. I have very thin, fine hair, and I really would have liked to have my hair curl. It will do it nartually, but only if its layered, otherwise it's just too heavy for my fine hair. :(

I didn't get layers though. She 'textured' the bottom inch or so but that is NOT fucking layers! So my hair is still one fucking length. *grumble*grumble*grumble*

I hate my fucking hair! Hate it! Hate it! Hate it! I can't do a fucking thing with it! When I try to straighten it, it's still just a big fucking disater. What the fuck is the good of getting my hair cut if it's not actually an improvement?!?!?!?

Another reason I wanted layers is that I have horrible split ends. All the way up... I needed/need the layers to get rid of them!! But nooo... No layers.

Now what the fuck am I supposed to do?! I can't afford to get it cut AGAIN.

*sigh* I just want to shave my head. I'm SO fucking frustrated!! I was SO SO SO looking forward to getting my hair cut! I haven't gotten it cut in a YEAR! A fucking year!! And now I'm stuck with with blah haircut that I did NOT want. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

It's My Birthday.....

As many of my readers know (since I expect only my closest of friends to ever pay attention), my birthday is fast approaching.

This year I plan to celebrate my birthday on my birthday - Friday July 11th.

The Plan: Dinner at Sultan's Tent in Toronto. Moroccan Food & Belly Dancers(!!!!). Price Fixed Menu: dinner starts @ ~$40/person (more with drinks, and if you choose to have items that have added $$ amounts).

I do understand it's a lot for dinner, and many of my friends have other things going on this month, but I really want to spend the night eating good food and watching the belly dancer with them - I just think it would be fun. Yes, I know I'm a goober, but I think that's the coolest thing ever! I've never seen a belly dancer before!

I've become really rather bitter about the whole birthday thing in the past couple of years. Aside from Harry Potter last year (which I do believe was more a stroke of luck than anything else) I have not celebrated MY birthday in more years than I can count! Ever since Sabrina's Brian joined the group we always celebrate his birthday, which is the day before mine, and EVERYONE ignores/forgets that I even have a birthday! So completely and totally unfair.

I do realise this is partly my fault. Even though I'm one of those weirdos that LOVES birthdays, I/we never do anything - probably in part cause I never say anything. Truth is, I just don't trust that I matter enough to everyone... That if I do ask I'll just get turned down.

Well I DO matter damnit, and even if everyone does turn me down - for whatever reason(the money, time, whatever) - I still want to do something for my birthday. So I'm going with Chris regardless.

But I did ask. Actually, I asked Neda what she thought, and she took up my cause. She's asked the gang, bless her. And to my utter surprise some of them have actually said yes!! All the ones she could get ahold of in fact!

Frankly I wouldn't even have bothered asking - I would have assumed a resounding "no" - but in a drunken stupor last Friday night (at Neda's birthday bash) I mentioned it to Alicia. She sounded so positive about wanting to go, and it being okay for me to ask, that I thought maybe I would give it a shot. After some sober thought, I agreed with my drunken though - what the hell, I'll ask; no harm in asking.

I still can't believe everyone (so far) has said yes!

I figured Neda would be all for it, she's sweet like that.

Angie and Will I really did think would say no, Angie usually isn't adventurous with food, it's also a lot of money, and I know money is often tight for them. But they said yes! *beams*

Jess and Rob I really wanted to come 'cause Jess is one of my best friends, but I really wasn't sure what she'd say. I couldn't/didn't come to her birthday because both Chris and I weren't working - we SO could not afford it . I really wanted to go, but I just didn't have the money. So I really didn't know what she'd think of me asking the same thing of her a few months later... But they said yes! *beams brighter*

Sabrina and Brian will likely say no. Neda's asked, but they haven't gotten back to her. Sabrina is the one that always complains to me about all the birthday's she has in June and July -there's Neda, then her mom, then Brian, then me (and possibly other's in between I don't know about). As a result I always get the short end of the stick with her. So I expect a resounding "No" from her, but that's okay really. I have enough "yes"es that I think we will all be able to enjoy ourselves.

I also got Neda to ask Alicia and Allen too. I figured since I mentioned it to her at the party and she seemed excited about it, I would ask them too. I hope they say yes. I'm not sure if Allen will be home from his family vacation by then, but I've love to have one or both of them there.

Originally I was just going to ask 'the gang' and Jess and Rob - I didn't want to inconvenience anyone else.... But, really, it shouldn't be an inconvenience damnit. I want to celebrate with my friends, is that so very wrong? I don't think so.